Wrongway Gary is left the deed to a restaurant by a hateful old uncle who believes that Gary, a notorious scam artist and low character, has wasted his life in pursuit of not growing up. It was hoped that the provisions of the will would rope the wayward man-child into responsibility. His first thought is to sell the restaurant and head west with the money but nobody's buying because the building lies on a fault line and the insurance premiums are through the roof. So Wrongway Gary, who is an ugly and bitter man, tries to burn it down but there's no wood in the building, not even the basement. He shatters every wine bottle in the cellar and then gets to work tearing up the kitchen. He takes out the windows and replaces them with nylon shower curtains. But people still come. People come and they are convinced Gary's imported a fine European chef. Well Wrongway Gary's had enough of this and he kills the chef and serves him to the customers one piece at a time. People say it's the best food served in the city and a long waiting list develops, populated by celebrities , the nearly famous, international jetsetters in Prada and Versace, and several reality tv productions.

Desperate to end the adulation and rising costs of providing for these people, Wrongway Gary admits that he's killed the chef and replaced him with a homeless man, that he's served the flesh of the dead chef to patrons, and that the mayor of the city himself has eaten at least half a pound of human flesh. This drives the prestige of the restaurant through the roof and it becomes the hottest nightspot in the city with a line of people behind a velvet rope that stretches several blocks.
“Well I'll show them,” Wrongway Gary says to himself one night. “ I'll just put poison in all the food and kill 'em off.” And he begins to poison the food, which by this point has degenerated further and further, even past Grade F meat, and the restaurant is now serving garbage culled from neighborhood dumpsters. The poison kills several people the first night and the restaurant is booked for solid for three years.

Wrongway Gary tries to sell the place again but everyone says without his business sense, they can't replicate the success. So Wrongway Gary begins to leave bits of food laying around the place until the whole establishment is filled with rats and roaches. The clientele becomes even more select and includes international celebrities, world leaders, and billionaire tech giants. Wrongway Gary, seeing no way out, blows up the restaurant, killing hundreds inside and out. The debris extends for miles and is scooped up by overjoyed residents, the bricks fetching hundreds of dollars each in internet auctions. Wrongway Gary is toasted as the most innovative businessman of the new age and is trumpeted as the People's Terrorist, the first Fortune 500 mogul that masses have ever embraced. He's so rich and respected that he kills himself.